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After the marriage many people struggle about finances. We will give you some tips how to avoid it. Whether the husband is frustrated with her shopping sprees, or the wife is angry about the money he spent on the night out with his guys, ever when it comes to marriage and money, power struggles are an endless cause of conflict in many families all over the world.

But it is not necessary that these situations must arise. Only a few simple changes can bring peace and harmony to the discussions that husband and wife have about finances. The downside is harmony when it comes to marriage and money. Although entirely possible, does not leave the room for one spouse to hold the purse strings. It is necessary to have to approach things from a partnership view. After all, is not such a situation what marriage is all about?

There exist  a solution in a true financial partnership with your significant other. There must be developed the situation that each of the partners is allowed ,to spend money without feeling guilty, or asking for permission.

Here are now the basics how this can be reached:

1. At first determine the approximate amount of money left over each month after joint activities and household bills are paid for. Then divide this amount in half, and chose the direct deposit it into individual accounts. Then there is one account for each spouse and that every month. Each one in the partnership know that it is their money, to do with as they please. A computer, new shoes, drinks with the boys, spa treatment, other shops: These types of purchase all come out of each person’s individual account and the other can accept.

2. You should create a household account for you both. All income earned from husband and wife gets deposited here. It is necessary to pay all household bills from this account. Also any joint activities are financed with this account. For example dinner together, new furniture, family ski trip, clothes for the children, and so on: These types of purchases all come from the household account. Both have to decide what will be necessary to get it from this account.


Only tow things. That is the reason why this system is simple, yet effective in that it accomplishes several things. What will happen:

--> It eliminates arguments about the personal spending. If she has to have a 350 Euro or Dollar blouse, then, as long as it does not come out of the household account, then everything is find. She has her account. It is the same if the husband wants the latest tech gadget, it’s no questions asked. He can do it from his money.

--> To behave in this manor eliminates power struggles over who makes more money. For the case the family income increases, everyone benefits from this effect.

--> It provides built in incentives for both parties to control household spending. It helps to communicate over major household purchases.

--> Each spouse has their own special strengths they bring to the marriage. When a spouse holds all the financial dolls and strings out an allowance, it does not foster an environment of equality. Neither does nitpicking at each other over shopping habits. It really helps.

--> To do so creates a true sense of partnership by leveling the playing field. 

It is really normal, as an adult, nobody wants to have to justify their purchases. It is really a very simple system. This system allows both parties to maintain their financial independence.

For the case it is not possible to really to commit to true equality, you can also divide funds into the individual accounts according to a percentage of the earnings of each one. For the case you earn the really most money for the family, this approach may feel more comfortable each one. If you react in this way there is a downside: It does not create a true partnership, nor is it at the end 100% equal. But it may however, be a good way to take a small step forward toward finding a marriage and money system that works for your family.

25.02.2009